The Idol of Control

The Idol of Control

I’d like you to turn in your Bibles this morning to John 18. Last week as we continued to study idols of the heart, I shared with you the five specific idols we all tend to worship. Let’s see if we can name them by remembering the acronym C-R-A-C-S. That stands for control, respect, appreciation (recognition), comfort, and success. After we identified them, we took the time to look at their biblical connection. Each of these idols is rooted in scripture. They have a legitimate source. But then we saw how our adversary uses these legitimate desires to his advantage. He twists the good just enough to make us think what we are doing is fine, when in reality it’s off the mark. And then we finished our time together by considering two critical questions. We know that there is a very fine line between worshipping an idol and the legitimate expression of God’s good, so how does one know when he has crossed the line? The first question is, “Do I sin to get what I want?” The second question is, “Do I sin when I don’t get what I want?” It doesn’t matter how noble the objective is, if I sin to obtain it, or if I sin when I don’t obtain it, it is a manifestation of an idol. How many of you became very familiar with those questions this week? The challenge was to ask them at least once a day, and I want you to continue with that objective.

What we are going to do this morning and for the next several Sundays is take a closer look at each of the five idols. I want to do four things with each of them. First of all, I am going to give you a definition. We need to know what the idol is, or what it looks like. That question is answered by a definition. Secondly, we will look at a biblical example where we see the idol in action. Again, this will help us identify it in our lives. The third point we’ll consider is what biblical principle is at stake every time the idol is being served. I want us to do this because I think it will help us appreciate the magnitude of idolatry. And finally, we will finish by considering examples of what the idol looks like in our everyday life. So as we are going through the study of the idol, I want you to be thinking of ways you can share with us of what that idol looks like in real life. I want you to talk to us this morning. I think one of the keys to identifying idols is to see how they are manifested in everyday life. So let’s jump right into it this morning and start with defining the idol of control.

As far as a definition, here’s what I want you to write down. The idol of control is when I am unwilling to let go of my agenda and let God do His work. And remember, it doesn’t matter how noble or defensible your objective is, if it is contrary to God’s agenda, I am worshipping at the idol of control. The idol of control is when I am unwilling to let go of my agenda and let God do His work.
Let’s look at several biblical examples. We will start in John 18, and this example may be debatable, but when you really look into it I believe you can see the elements that identify the idol of control. These events take place right at the end of Jesus’ life. He has just prayed a beautiful prayer in chapter 17, and if the disciples were listening, they knew His time left on earth was short. In this context we read starting in 18:1,

“When Jesus had spoken these words, He went forth with His disciples over the ravine of the Kidron, where there was a garden, into which He Himself entered, and His disciples. 2 Now Judas also, who was betraying Him, knew the place; for Jesus had often met there with His disciples. 3 Judas then, having received the Roman cohort, and officers from the chief priests and the Pharisees, came there with lanterns and torches and weapons. 4 Jesus therefore, knowing all the things that were coming upon Him, went forth, and said to them, "Whom do you seek?" 5 They answered Him, "Jesus the Nazarene." He said to them, "I am He." And Judas also who was betraying Him, was standing with them. 6 When therefore He said to them, "I am He," they drew back, and fell to the ground. 7 Again therefore He asked them, "Whom do you seek?" And they said, "Jesus the Nazarene." 8 Jesus answered, "I told you that I am He; if therefore you seek Me, let these go their way," 9 that the word might be fulfilled which He spoke, "Of those whom Thou hast given Me I lost not one." 10 Simon Peter therefore having a sword, drew it, and struck the high priest's slave, and cut off his right ear; and the slave's name was Malchus. 11 Jesus therefore said to Peter, "Put the sword into the sheath; the cup which the Father has given Me, shall I not drink it?"

How many of you see the idol of control here? At first glance, we might be tempted to say this was simply an example of coming to the defense of your master, that this was a legitimate act of protection on the part of Peter. I would contend, though, that the disciples knew Jesus was destined for death. He had told them that He was going to be hauled before the High Priest and suffer many things. In John 12 He had been anointed with perfume by Mary and told his disciples that she was doing this in preparation for his burial. In John 13 He told them one of them was going to betray him. In John 14 he told them he was returning to his Father’s home to prepare dwelling places for them. In John 16 he tells them explicitly that in a little while they would no longer see him. In John 17 he tells them that he is no longer going to be in the world. So in John 18 when a bunch of Roman soldiers show up with official representatives of the High Priest, it seems to me like Peter would have put one and one together. But even more significant than that is what Jesus says in verse 11. Regardless of Peter’s noble intentions, Jesus says, “Shall I not drink the cup which the Father has given me?” Jesus was basically telling Peter to let go of his agenda and let God’s work be carried out. It was God’s will for Jesus to suffer, and circumventing that plan by armed resistance was not a good thing. So even though we might excuse Peter here on the grounds of ignorance, all the elements are in place that indicate the idol of control.

Let’s turn next to a much more obvious example of the idol of control, and it is found in the life of Rebekah. Turn with me next to Gen. 25:19.

Now these are the records of the generations of Isaac, Abraham's son: Abraham became the father of Isaac; 20 and Isaac was forty years old when he took Rebekah, the daughter of Bethuel the Aramean of Paddan-aram, the sister of Laban the Aramean, to be his wife. 21 And Isaac prayed to the LORD on behalf of his wife, because she was barren; and the LORD answered him and Rebekah his wife conceived. 22 But the children struggled together within her; and she said, "If it is so, why then am I this way?" So she went to inquire of the LORD. 23 And the LORD said to her, "Two nations are in your womb; and two peoples shall be separated from your body; And one people shall be stronger than the other; And the older shall serve the younger." [Remember this statement from God to Rebekah.] 24 When her days to be delivered were fulfilled, behold, there were twins in her womb. 25 Now the first came forth red, all over like a hairy garment; and they named him Esau. 26 And afterward his brother came forth with his hand holding on to Esau's heel, so his name was called Jacob; and Isaac was sixty years old when she gave birth to them. 27 When the boys grew up, Esau became a skillful hunter, a man of the field; but Jacob was a peaceful man, living in tents. 28 Now Isaac loved Esau, because he had a taste for game; but Rebekah loved Jacob.

Now let’s skip over to chapter 27 and pick up reading in verse one.

Now it came about, when Isaac was old, and his eyes were too dim to see, that he called his older son Esau and said to him, "My son." And he said to him, "Here I am." 2 And Isaac said, "Behold now, I am old and I do not know the day of my death. 3 "Now then, please take your gear, your quiver and your bow, and go out to the field and hunt game for me; 4 and prepare a savory dish for me such as I love, and bring it to me that I may eat, so that my soul may bless you before I die." 5 And Rebekah was listening while Isaac spoke to his son Esau. So when Esau went to the field to hunt for game to bring home, 6 Rebekah said to her son Jacob, "Behold, I heard your father speak to your brother Esau, saying, 7 'Bring me some game and prepare a savory dish for me, that I may eat, and bless you in the presence of the LORD before my death.' 8 "Now therefore, my son, listen to me as I command you. 9 "Go now to the flock and bring me two choice kids from there, that I may prepare them as a savory dish for your father, such as he loves. 10 "Then you shall bring it to your father, that he may eat, so that he may bless you before his death." 11 And Jacob answered his mother Rebekah, "Behold, Esau my brother is a hairy man and I am a smooth man. 12 "Perhaps my father will feel me, then I shall be as a deceiver in his sight; and I shall bring upon myself a curse and not a blessing." 13 But his mother said to him, "Your curse be on me, my son; only obey my voice, and go, get them for me." 14 So he went and got them, and brought them to his mother; and his mother made savory food such as his father loved. 15 Then Rebekah took the best garments of Esau her elder son, which were with her in the house, and put them on Jacob her younger son. 16 And she put the skins of the kids on his hands and on the smooth part of his neck. 17 She also gave the savory food and the bread, which she had made, to her son Jacob. 18 Then he came to his father and said, "My father." And he said, "Here I am. Who are you, my son?" 19 And Jacob said to his father, "I am Esau your first-born; I have done as you told me. Get up, please, sit and eat of my game, that you may bless me." 20 And Isaac said to his son, "How is it that you have it so quickly, my son?" And he said, "Because the LORD your God caused it to happen to me." 21 Then Isaac said to Jacob, "Please come close, that I may feel you, my son, whether you are really my son Esau or not." 22 So Jacob came close to Isaac his father, and he felt him and said, "The voice is the voice of Jacob, but the hands are the hands of Esau." 23 And he did not recognize him, because his hands were hairy like his brother Esau's hands; so he blessed him. 24 And he said, "Are you really my son Esau?" And he said, "I am." 25 So he said, "Bring it to me, and I will eat of my son's game, that I may bless you." And he brought it to him, and he ate; he also brought him wine and he drank. 26 Then his father Isaac said to him, "Please come close and kiss me, my son." 27 So he came close and kissed him; and when he smelled the smell of his garments, he blessed him and said, "See, the smell of my son Is like the smell of a field which the LORD has blessed; 28 Now may God give you of the dew of heaven, And of the fatness of the earth, And an abundance of grain and new wine; 29 May peoples serve you, And nations bow down to you; Be master of your brothers, And may your mother's sons bow down to you. Cursed be those who curse you, And blessed be those who bless you."

I think you would agree with me that the idol of control is much more obvious in this story than the last. On a personal level, how many of you can really sympathize with Rebekah? Hadn’t God had told her that her younger son (her favorite) was going to rule over her older son. Can you appreciate her dilemma? Think about this. When her husband Isaac asked for the special meal to be made so he could confer the patriarchal blessing on Esau, Rebekah was at the crisis point. What is she going to do? Is she going to demonstrate trust and let God bring about what He had promised, or was she going to demonstrate a lack of trust and take things into her own hands? She has a choice to make. Is she going to let God accomplish His work His way, or is she going to insert herself into the formula and help God out? Well, we know she didn’t trust God and instead worshipped the idol of control.

And if you’d like to do some further study, take some time this afternoon to contrast Rebekah’s crisis with the same basic crisis Abraham faced in Gen. 22. Both of these parents faced the same dilemma with their children in that they had both been promised by God that certain things were going to be accomplished by their children. And when that promise looked to be in jeopardy, Rebekah responded very differently from Abraham.

Now how do we know this was idol worship? Remember our two questions? Did Rebekah sin to get what she wanted? And remember, what she wanted was something God had promised her. But did she sin to get it? Absolutely. What were her sins? She deceived her husband (27:9). This violates every rule of biblical communication there is. She circumvented her husband’s plans (27:10), which has to do with the whole head of the household issue. She caused her son to deceive his father and repeatedly lie to his father. This is the really scary part, especially when you evaluate it in light of what Jesus had to say about causing children to sin in Mt. 18.

Let’s think next about what biblical principle is at stake in worshipping the idol of control. What is at the heart of this issue? Human control, manipulating circumstances to get your desire or to bring about your agenda is the opposite of what? God’s sovereignty. Turn with me to Rom. 8:28. In this verse Paul lets us know that God is at work in all circumstances, even when you can’t see Him. “And we know that God causes (many things / most things / the really big things) all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” Would this principle have applied to Rebekah’s dilemma? Absolutely! Would this principle have applied to Peter’s dilemma when he saw those soldiers coming to arrest Jesus? Absolutely! Every time we sin to bring about something we desire (no matter how good it is), we are worshiping the idol of control. We are saying by our actions that we don’t trust God to “cause all things to work together for good.”

And finally, let’s think about how this idol is demonstrated in our lives. Does anyone have an example for us? How have you seen the idol of control in action (obviously not in your life, but in the lives of people you know)?

Sometimes, it is part of God’s plan for people we love dearly, to experience hardship and even suffer! It would be similar to how God’s plan for His Son involved suffering to bring about the accomplishment of a greater work. And one of the ways we exercise the idol of control is by trying to shield those we love from harsh consequences. We have to learn how to let go of our agenda and let God do His work. This could be as small as the parent who lies to the policeman about the whereabouts of his son after there has been vandalism in the neighborhood, to something as large as the wife who lies to the jury to keep her pedophile husband out of prison. God has a plan for everyone’s life, and sometimes the only way that plan will be accomplished is through great difficulty.

Another particular application I want to share with you about the idol of control concerns wives with unsaved husbands or spiritually weak husbands [define]. If you find yourself in those circumstances, you have to exercise special diligence in this area because of the temptation to manipulate circumstances or control circumstances to bring about your desire for a saved or spiritually strong husband. And again, it is a noble objective – certainly on par with God’s promise to Rebekah that the older son was going to serve the younger. But how far are you going to go to reach your objective?

I was recently reading about a woman who had a saved husband, but he didn’t pray with her, or seem all that excited about spiritual things. He was a little bit socially awkward and wouldn’t go to church functions. She had to talk him into going to church with her, and then he’d leave as soon as he could, so she didn’t have lots of opportunities to just hang around after church and chat. And she longed for a spiritually vibrant husband who loved church and would spend time with her talking of the things of God and lead the family in spiritual matters.
Unfortunately, what she ended up doing was sulking, and giving him the silent treatment, and even withholding affection from him when he would not do the way she wanted him to; and when he would do what she wanted, she would respond very positively. Do you see the idol of control? How do you know it was an idol? Because of her sinful behavior. As noble an objective as it is to have a spiritually vibrant husband, a wife should never use a system of rewards and punishments to motivate him toward godliness. That is something God has to do. But even more telling is that her counselor, who was relating this story, said she eventually divorced him and married someone else who could “more fully meet [my] needs for a spiritually vibrant spouse.” What does that statement tell you? Who would like to respond to that statement?

Was her real concern for her husband to have a close walk with God? Is that what she was really after? Not at all? A spiritual husband was simply a stepping stone toward her personal fulfillment. A spiritually vibrant husband benefitted her in the long run. And as you think about it, there were two idols at work here, control and comfort.

Sometimes, we just have to step back and let God do his work! We have to let go and let God. Several years ago we were sitting around a campfire and Daniel was using the tip of his new knife to pry a piece of bark off a tree stump. I told him that knives weren’t made for prying and chiseling, that they needed to be used for cutting only – so he assured me that this knife blade was made of good steel and prying that piece of bark off wouldn’t hurt it. Instead of forcing him to put his knife away, I went back to what I was doing and just watched him out of the corner of my eye. So he immediately put the tip of the knife under the bark and pried again, and sure enough, the tip broke off. I glanced away quickly enough that he couldn’t see that I had seen it, and I didn’t say a word to him about it to him until I asked his permission to use this illustration! But that is a lesson he will never forget – and I could have circumvented that lesson by controlling the situation.

As a congregation, let’s focus on the idol of control this week. We know what it is. We know what it looks like. We have seen biblical examples. We have seen real life examples, and we have seen the bad results this particular idol brings about. Let’s ask God to show us how we worship this idol this week. Let’s ask the Holy Spirit to convict us when we are at worship. And let’s ask God for grace to tear down the idol of control.